127 - The Sexy Boss – How the empowerment of women is changing the rule book for sex, money and success.

Social Media Business Hour with Nile Nickel

Heather Ann Havenwood, CEO of Havenwood Worldwide, LLC and Chief Sexy Boss, is a serial entrepreneur and is regarded as a top authority on internet marketing, business strategies and marketing. Since marketing her first online business in 1999, bringing together clients and personal coaches, she has played an active role in the online marketing world since before most even had a home computer.

In 2006 she started, developed and grew an online information marketing publishing company from ground zero to over $1 million in sales in less than 12 months. Starting without a list, a product, a name or an offer, Heather Ann molded her client into a successful guru now known as an expert in his field.

Heather Ann has been named by a few as an ‘Icon Creator’ or the ‘Wizard Behind the Curtain’. She has instructed, coached and promoted hundreds of entrepreneurs leading them down the path to success. She has produced and managed over 350 seminars and events and hosted tele-seminars with many top online thought leaders such as Richard Flint, John Alanis, Susan Bratton, Alicia Lyttle, Tom Antion, Alex Mandossian, Legend Joe Sugarman, Anthony Blake, David Lakhani, Robert Shemin and many others.

Heather Ann currently is the Author of…Sexy Boss: How the empowerment of women is changing the Rule Book for sex, money and success (available on Amazon click HERE!) and The Game of Dating and How to Play it: A rule book for divorced men stepping back into the game.

Heather Ann Havenwood is smart, sexy, savvy and now stepping out from behind the curtain to educate, enlighten and empower women entrepreneurs to grow or start an online business and live a fearless and fulfilled life.

Heather Anne Havenwood, CEO of Havenwood Worldwide, LLC and Chief Sexy Boss, is a serial entrepreneur and is regarded as a top authority on internet marketing, business strategies and marketing. Since marketing her first online business in 1999, bringing together clients and personal coaches, she has played an active role in the online marketing world since before most even had a home computer. In 2006 she started, developed and grew an online information marketing publishing company from ground zero to over $1 million in sales in less than 12 months. Starting without a list, a product, a name or an offer, Heather Ann molded her client into a successful guru now known as an expert in his field. Heather Anne has been named by a few as an ‘Icon Creator’ or the ‘Wizard Behind the Curtain’. She has instructed, coached and promoted hundreds of entrepreneurs leading them down the path to success. She has produced and managed over 350 seminars and events and hosted teleseminars with many top online thought leaders such as Richard Flint, John Alanis, Susan Bratton, Alicia Lyttle, Tom Antion, Alex Mandossian, Legend Joe Sugarman, Anthony Blake, David Lakhani, Robert Shemin and many others. Heather Anne currently is the Author of The Sexy Boss: How the empowerment of women is changing the Rule Book for sex, money and success (available on Amazon click HERE!) and The Game of Dating and How to Play it: A rule book for divorced men stepping back into the game. Heather Anne Havenwood is smart, sexy, savvy and now stepping out from behind the curtain to educate, enlighten and empower women entrepreneurs to grow or start an online business and live a fearless and fulfilled life.

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? When Your Greatest Mistake Became Tremendous Success

Heather’s life is pretty phenomenal. She started out creating her first business plan in 1999 while taking an Internet Marketing course. The funny thing is, she found herself enjoying it so much, that a few years later, she developed and grew her online information marketing publishing company from ground zero. Heather didn’t have a list, product, name, offer and STILL went from zero to making over a million dollars In less than 12 months…and the really impressive thing is, she did it all over again with her next venture. Sadly, no story about a true master is complete without some acknowledgement of failure and Heather, like so many of us, was not immune to setbacks. Read on to learn how Heather handled bankruptcy, starting over from scratch and the important lessons she learned along the way…

Tough Lessons Learned And What It Means To Be An ENTREPRENEUR

After she lost her business, Heather had nothing. She even had to go back to Corporate America and get a job. Not satisfied with failure, she quickly set about analyzing what happened, how the business failed and how she was going to prevent it from happening again.

Heather says “In business and entrepreneurship, you have to fail. Success and failure are always part of the journey. You will fail over and over and over again, but no matter how many times you fail, if you want to finish strong and successful, you just have to continue to play the game strong”.

Heather learned her lesson the hard way and now she plays the game as a master. She is now stronger and wiser Heather. Something she would not have achieved without such a strong desire for excellence. Heather looked for the main reason why her business failed. Not being a lawyer, she realized that when it comes to legal help, she needed to employ experts to guide her. Now, anything that comes across her desk gets reviewed by her legal team. Something she recommends for all entrepreneurs…especially those of use just starting out.

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? “The Sexy Boss”

Heather is the author of “The Sexy Boss” – How the empowerment of women is changing the rule book for sex, money and success. Unlike Many other business books, that are all about marketing and business, Heather aims to inspire you. She offers some incredible lessons about how she rose above her CHALLENGES and how you can do the same.

The Real Deal…You Must Promote Yourself

Like most people, Heather initially didn’t want to promote herself. We often see it is “Bragging”…which in our culture is socially unacceptable. Then she looked at the most successful entrepreneurs and realized that if she’s going to emulate them and achieve their level of success, she would have to emulate how they promote themselves as well. Now, a very strong advocate for self-promotion, Heather instructs all entrepreneurs to embrace that very necessary skill – no matter how uncomfortable it may be. Whether you belong to a big or small corporation, no matter what kind of business you’re in, you have to be constantly and consistently promoting yourself. Everyone needs to learn how to market themselves, especially in today’s corporate and entrepreneurial world. This is a skill that is often ignored as it makes most people uncomfortable…but it is absolutely essential. If you do not learn how to promote yourself, you’ll simply fall behind your competition who is willing to learn how to promote themselves.

Top 3 Reasons Why Most People Won’t Promote Themselves

Nowadays more women than men are resistant towards self-promotion because:

• They don’t know how to promote themselves
• They don’t feel comfortable
• They are not taught how to self-promote

Heather declares (and this is crucial): It is all about the right mindset. She understands that you are taught NOT to be strong self-promoter. However, once you get past your personal hang-ups embrace the importance of self-promotion, then it will become easy to “Own it”. Becoming a great self-promoter will be second nature to you. Learning how to do this is one of the many reasons why she wrote her book, “The Sexy Boss”.

?Life Lessons From “The Sexy Boss”

Here are Heather’s key takeaways and life lessons openly shared to all of us in this incredible interview

1. In business and entrepreneurship, you have to fail to succeed
2. You have to constantly promote and market yourself. Become a master of self-promotion. Some entrepreneurs even become successful because they know how to promote themselves – not necessarily because they are good at performing.
3. Know your skillset and be good at it. Choose something you are confident with…something no one can seriously question your background and authority.
4. Never stop advertising yourself and your business.
5. Keep at it – don’t give up and don’t let your failures beat you down.
6. If you’re going through something… just get out of your head. There’s a time and place for everything.
7. Always say to yourself “I’m the most important person in my life” – Practice Mature Selfishness.
8. Everything happens for the best – It is a journey. As long as you feel that no matter what the situation is - Bad, good, car wreck or someone giving you flowers everything happens for the best. It's all about the process.
9. Always try to learn a new skillset.
10. If you’re a writer. Be confident. Be Confident That You Have the Power Of The Pen.
11. Learn how to use the power of words and understand the world of wordsmiths. Understanding marketing and getting people to buy something for your business is key.
12. Learn to shift your mindset completely to your advantage.
13. If it is just you and your head, you’re in the worst place. You've got to get out of your head.
14. Treat your failure not as failure but a learning experience resulting to a better you.

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?Heather’s Marketing Strategy

Heather maximizes the power of email marketing. She has many different market segments (Yes, she has pretty big business). What she normally does is constant email communication with her subscribers. Normally she emails all of them four to five times a day and applies all of her marketing strategies. Check out even more of Heather’s great business advice…

1. Depending on the day – Learn Broadcasting. Constantly send out email marketing
2. Email marketing should be like TV advertising. They like to sell products to an audience any time of the day.
3. Never get tired of advertising your business.
4. Strategize and Prepare The Information You Want To Release.
5. Try to have A “Demographic Plan”
6. Include “Follow-Up’s” in Your Marketing Plans

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[content_toggle style="1" label="Read%20Full%20Show%20Transcript%20Here" hide_label="Hide"] Heather: Nile. Nile: Tell me you could hear me today. Heather: Yay. Nile: Good, good, good. Heather: I can. Very well actually. You sound great. Nile: Well, this is the way it should've sounded yesterday but for some reason it wasn’t so -- Heather: No worries. I had some other technical stuff that was just kind of going on then so it's okay. It happens. Nile: Great. Well, we are going to do a complete do over. Heather: Okay. No worries. Nile: We'll do the tease, I'll welcome you back and we will do your bio interactively as I talked about. One thing that I'm going to take -- I thought about this overnight that I want to do a little bit of a shift on is just what we did yesterday. You talked about hey, I made my first million and then I found it was easier to do it over again. And that's a big mind set thing and I don't know how much into mind set you are but I want to talk about. Heather: Oh, have to be. You fail that much. You go through your mind set. Yeah, absolutely. Nile: Not a problem. So, just so you know where I'm going to go. Heather: Okay. Nile: Super. So, you know everything now. We're rolling so the tease and then about five seconds of silence and then I'll come in and do the bio interactively. Heather: Okay. Hi, I'm Heather Havenwood and welcome. Hold on, I forgot the -- I just went blank. One second. You edit, right? Nile: Yeah, we do. Heather: I just went -- I've got to have your name right in front of me or I just go blank which I just did and I'm pre coffee so -- Nile: Oh, no. Heather: I'm like a quarter in so all right. Here we go. Let's do it again. Hi, I'm Heather Havenwood and welcome to social media business hour. In this hour you and I are going to explore together with Nile an amazing story of overcoming adversity and more importantly how you can make money in business today so stay tuned. Nile: I'm absolutely excited about our guest today for a number of reasons. One is I like not only her physical name but I like her company name. The way she's branded herself. I think it's cutting edge and I think you'll be excited about it as well so who am I talking about? I'm talking about Heather Anne Havenwood. She's a serial entrepreneur, sales and marketing coach, copywriter, small business activist. I love that Heather. And chief sexy boss. Welcome Heather. Heather: Thank you for having me Nile. This is going to be a lot of fun. Nile: Oh, it is going to be a lot of fun. Well, I want to tell everybody that's gathered here a little bit about you just so -- they've got the same background I do so you are the CEO of Havenwood World Wide LLC and as I'd mentioned earlier chief sexy boss. I love that. A serial entrepreneur and regarded as a top authority in internet marketing, business strategies and marketing in general. Since marketing your first online business in 1999, bringing clients and personal coaches together you've played an active role in the online marketing world since most of us even had a home computer. Heather: That sounds like I'm so old. Nile: That's one of the things I was commenting yesterday. If anybody goes and looks at your website at heatherhavenwood.com -- yeah, you're not old. Heather: I'm not old but _____03:31 that way. I did that in 1999. I was actually in college and I had an internet marketing course. It was the very first one and I was taking a marketing course from this particular professor and she got the university to let her into this one little internet marketing course. This is '98, '99. No kidding. And I took these courses. Like I want you to take it so I was like I'll take it, I'll take it. So, I took it and then we create this whole business plan. I mean, it was like 50 pages, 60 pages plus, plus. It was called best fit coach and I did this whole -- it was '99. How do you market? No idea that was going to be my future. It was just more like oh, this is fun. So, I just find that interesting little things along the way in life. All of a sudden you go oh, that's why that happened. So, yeah. 1999. Nile: Well, one of the things that I love about that is you said this was fun and of course that's what makes it easier. We're going to talk a little bit about mind set today, just a bit but that fun part's going to be a key portion of it. But let's fast forward just a little bit. In 2006 you started and developed and grew an online information marketing publishing company from ground zero to over a million dollars in sales in less than 12 months and you started it without a list, a product, a name, an offer, nothing. Heather: Correct, yeah. Nile: That's pretty phenomenal so I think if anybody could help us learn what to do to grow our businesses I think you're well qualified but you haven’t done that once, have you? You've done it multiple times? Heather: I've done it again, yeah. And I -- what's interesting about it is that that one business that I kind of bang my head on at the same time it's also my biggest failure. It's also the business that I went to bankruptcy over and lost everything over because I had a business partner that he was the face and I built everything around him and then there's this thing called contracts and lawyers and I forgot all that stuff so one day I came home and it was all gone but it was just like oh, aha, I've made this huge success but then my biggest failure and this other side of it, how did that happen? So, spent a few years trying to figure that out like how did that happen, who am I, kind of those things and I think it's through those kinds of times you really realize who you are as a person and what your really want because there is definitely a moment in time like screw this. I'm going to corporate America again which I did try. I lasted 90 days. Nile: Wow. And I bet that was pure torture. Heather: It was, it was, yeah. And so I went okay. I get it. It was just a -- you have to -- in business and entrepreneurship you have to fail. It's part of it. Now, we all sometimes hear stories of people like their first home run. That doesn't happen. Even home runs, even people on -- who literally do football and baseball and touchdowns. How many times are they going after that touchdown, how many times they actually try to hit the ball to get that -- at the park. It's over and over and over and over and over again so that's entrepreneurship is same thing. You have to play the game the same way where it's over and over and over again and you're going to hit one maybe out of park. You might be the next Facebook. I don't know. Maybe not. You might be striking out. But at the same time it's about getting up there on the bat and hitting over and over again. But once you -- I was _____06:50 long time ago after my failure. I was like if you can do that Heather you can do it again because it's just like a game. You get up there, you hit again where you hit but then some stuff happened afterwards and now you know where your hole is, legal stuff. Now guess what. I got a lawyer. Nile: I'm not going to make that mistake again. Heather: I do, yeah. And nowadays if anything comes across my desk in that world I'm like okay. I'll run it by my lawyer. And they get why are you doing that? I'm like because I learned my lesson. So, it's an interesting dynamic of what you learn over time. Especially in the entrepreneurship world. Nile: That's outstanding. I love the fact that you learned through those failures and I know that will be part of what you've talked about and everything else here. But then I know that you went on to help a ton of other people and some big name people and I'm not going to drop the names. The names will be shared in our show notes at social media business hour but I could tell you looking at the list I'm impressed. And some neat people too. Just besides being recognizable names I know a number of these folks as well. They're great and fun people. But you're currently the author of sexy boss. How the empowerment of women is changing the rulebook for sex, money and success and I suspect you probably tell a few of these stories in that book. Heather: Yeah, I do. Sexy boss, that book specifically, it was my -- it's kind of coming out of my life story. Up unto this point it's been more about niche marketing and doing business but sexy boss was kind of like this is who I am by the way behind the curtain and it was -- the name sexy boss came from _____08:38 and I are dear friends and I was visiting him in Vegas and he's like you're like a sexy boss. He's of course a wordsmith and so I was like oh, I like that. He's like yeah. So, all of a sudden we trademarked it. So, and then I was like I should write a book about over that. He's like well that's who you emulate so it was kind of this that's interesting. How do I emulate that and how do I become an entrepreneur and then how do I help other people to tap into their higher self. I call it a higher self and how to tap into their entrepreneurship because I think everyone is an entrepreneur. Everyone is. No matter if they're inside a big, large corporation. I call that an intra entrepreneur. You have to be constantly promoting yourself and constantly be marketing yourself, all the time. No matter what kind of business you're in you have to be _____09:29 to do that especially nowadays. So, if you're not learning that skill set then you're going to be falling behind and I think more for women than men necessarily is that women necessarily don't always know how to do that, they don't feel comfortable doing that. They're not taught that. We're taught to share our toys. Not to beat up and be strong. So, it's just a different mindset that once you learn it and understand it and then own it then you can be a great self promoter. I mean, look at Donald Trump right now. He's -- I would call one of the masters of self promotion and some people fault him for that. And I'm like he's actually brilliant for that because self-promotion is the way of the future and you have to continue it all the time or you're not going to be able to what I call succeed in whatever you want to do so that's my take and that's why I wrote that story. Nile: I knew that my cohost Jordan was going to be jumping up and down and wetting himself because he heard the name Joe Sugerman and Jordan likes to study copy write. He likes to practice copywriting and Joe's one of those big copywriter names. Heather: He is. He's a dear, dear friend of mine. _____10:37 time. We did an event together, we cohosted together called successmagnetseminar.com and the other speakers on the stage were John _____10:47 John Carlton, Joe Polish, Joe Sugerman, myself. And we actually had a hard time getting people there. It was like only 110 people there and then a few months later they did the Titans event, the big, huge Titans event and they got hundreds of people there at like triple the price and people -- the reason why we had a hard time is people didn't believe it. Like how are you getting all those names on one stage? And it was really because of Joe. So, Joe -- so, that was the reason but it's just kind of -- looking back now I -- now I sell the DVDs of it but it was a phenomenal event with some powerful, powerful copywriters and entrepreneurs on that stage. Nile: Yeah. It was funny. I knew most of them. And we're up against a break so let us take a break. Everybody stick around. Join us next segment. Hey, welcome back to social media business hour. We're here with Heather Havenwood. We're having a great time and I cut my poor cohost off last segment. He's jumping up and down, squiming sideways, just making all sorts of faces because he's got something that he just has to ask so Jordan what do you got for us? Jordan: Well, I just had to -- I actually had to interject is what I had to do because I thought Heather just dropped so many awesome golden nuggets on us. I mean, just to start with you've got to be promoting yourself even if you are in corporate American and I've got to tell you I laughed when I heard that. Nile: You didn't learn that lesson for a long time, did you? Jordan: I did not. No. and as a matter of fact there were people who I felt like this person is dumber than me. How could they possibly be making more money in a better position than I am? Well, the answer is they were better at self-promoting than I was. In fact, they understood self-promotion and I didn't even understand it. Nile: You just thought that was for the circus, right? Jordan: I thought that was just for the circus. Nile: Well, I know that Heather's going to talk with us a lot about mind set and some things like that as well and obviously that comes into that but I think that's great. I think we've got a good idea of your background but I have to ask you the question. You talked about sexy boss being your coming out book. What was the motivation behind that for you? Heather: Thanks for asking that. The motivation was -- how do I say this? It was a -- I call it the butterfly effect because I went through my bankruptcy and I went through this kind of dark time of trying to discover what am I going to do and I held the skill set of online marketing and copywriting but I feel like this kind of failure bla, bla, bla. And I lived on an island for about a year. I did nothing except stare at the ocean. It was kind of interesting. And for being an A type personality starting at the ocean for a year is actually challenging. It's like being in a yoga position or something for a year and it was hard. I didn't know what to do, wasn’t sure, questioned who I was so I went through this process and then I moved to Austin which I'm at now and that's when I started my dating business where I teach women how to communicate with women mainly because I knew the skills of information marketing, online marketing and someone said to me once you should do something where no one questions you for your background. No one questions you for your authority. No one can question me on that. And so -- because I didn't want to come out and start teaching people how to do online marketing when I “was a failure” at that point. I just don't like when people do that but that's all I do is teach internet marketing. They don't have any other businesses. So, I thought okay. I'll do that. And then after a few years of growing that business and being full time on that business and kind of coming back I thought it's time I told my story and I'm not really like that. I'm not a person that's going out there usually telling my story. I'm like this private and I don't want people to know that I failed and -- so, it was kind of for me my butterfly coming out and actually going oh, my god. I'm actually going to tell people that I went through this because not many people knew. It wasn’t public. I just kind of disappeared. The most powerful part of that was not really writing it. I did an audio book. It's actually on Audible and if anyone's ever done an audio book, audio book is very different than a communication like this because you have to read every single word of the book and you have to actually act like you're not dying doing it. And I'm having to sit here and read my story with emphasis, with like every word _____15:35 and it was hard and that's when I really got that this is my story and coming out there and telling people hey, I failed. I failed big time and I lost everything and I've come back. This is -- now I've come back. And now I want to help you. And so that's why I wrote the book. It was more of an inspirational motivation book for myself and for other people in telling my story. It's pretty powerful. Nile: In that story that you just told though I find something very fascinating and gosh, there's just so much I want to get to here today and I know our time together is limited but this is just fascinating to me because here you're talking about applying what you learned in your online marketing business. Granted, hey you failed at that at least first time out. Came back -- Heather: Legal side. Nile: Knocked it dead so that's not a failure. That's a learning experience. But the second part of that is you talked about applying what you learned to dating advice for men and how to better communicate to women. Heather: Yes. Nile: I find that so fascinating. Can you tell us just a little bit about that? Heather: Yeah. Oh, sure, yeah. That's my main business. That's what I do day in and day out and it's called datingtriggers.com and the niche is from a woman's perspective teaching men how to talk, communicate, attract, date, be with women. So, and that's a big market. That's a big challenge people have especially nowadays and the reason why it's a challenge mainly is not that women are weird or men are weird or something's wrong or anything. It's more about just communication has changed over time and so you see men who maybe got divorced and they're trying to get back in the dating world and it's like all confusing. It's just different or they're surrounded by women in the workplace, they're surrounded all the time and they're not taught necessarily how to communicate in a way that's effective that they get what they want. I teach a lot about how to get what you want in a relationship with a woman. I know that's kind of like counter intuitive but it is about how to attract and get what you want. So, yeah. That's what I do. It's kind of fun. Datingtriggers.com and onlydateyoungerwomen.com and I love that business. It's a lot of fun. I call my little guys, I talk to them all the time, I call them hey studs and they love it but they're a lot -- it's a lot of fun. I really enjoy it and that's kind of my bread and butter of my life. That's also where I do all my testing for my “marketing experience”. I do email marketing, I email them four to five times a day. I have all kinds of different segments with them. It's a pretty big business. Yeah. That's where I do a lot of my what I call testing and what I call marketing strategies and I do no social media with that business believe it or not. Nile: Oh, wow, wow. Well, you know -- Heather: Yeah, none. Nile: As we're sitting here chatting I'm thinking -- first of all, my wife and I, I think have a very good relationship and we communicate very well but I don't think that you could ever communicate at your peak all the time and I do believe -- hey, we're the same creatures but we communicate differently. I like the old 80s book whatever. Men are from Venus, Women from Mars. Whatever, vice versa. Women from Venus actually. But in any case -- Heather: I'll teach you one -- let me teach you one thing that I've sometimes I've had to teach this or communicate this or teach this really to someone I was just doing business with. We were having a kind of a challenge talking and I finally go let me explain something how women think if you're working with women. He just kind of had this like -- Nile: Rolling his eyes? Heather: Yeah, yeah. Well, it was on the phone so I'm sure he was. I said, women like choices. We like choices. That's why we shop. That's why we go shoe shopping because there are all these choices. We like menus. We love choices. He's like okay. I go when I come to you with this problem whatever it was you coming back with one solution -- no. give me my choices. I want to pick. He's like oh. So, the next time we talked he's like okay, here's all your options. Oh, great. I get to choose. You know what I mean? Nile: I love it. Heather: Yeah, yeah. It's really funny. I think he was like -- he's young. I could tell on the phone he's like young. He's like 25 and I'm thinking I hope he's really getting this. I hope he's really taking this to heart. Like this is a good lesson for him because I promise you you'll use it forever. It's not honey, you want to go to dinner, you want to go to this restaurant? It's like honey, do you want to go to dinner at seven? There's this, this or this. And she'll go oh, I want that. Nile: There you go. Heather: And then she's all happy. Nile: And she's happier. Well, my wife is a very patient and strong woman and so in that respect she's done a good job I think training me although I've got a long way to go I'm sure. Heather: Of course, that's -- Nile: But I like where you talked about your dating site being your bread and butter. Well, I want you to put some honey on top of that bread and butter because I think you've got a great program for us married men that really want an enhanced and powerful relationship with our wife and that's a great thing. And one of the things that we know sometimes as men we're not necessarily ready to put it out there with somebody that we treasure. Sometimes we are but hey. We'd rather have a chat with somebody that sort of got our back and has the best advice to get us the optimal results which is ultimately what you're doing. Heather: I agree, yeah. I have a good time with it. There's a lot of guys out there teaching other guys like pick up artists and things -- that's like the niche. That's not me. I'm coming from a woman's perspective. I call it be, be real, be the stud that you know you are because it's kind of this I've got your back, I'm your -- the woman in your side. I want to help you become the man you know you were meant to be. Whatever that is. Because I think in this society today men sometimes feel like -- not all of them. Like I'm not sure here. I feel like I need to like dumb down a little better. I'm not sure. So, they feel insecure. They're just not sure like where to -- so, I just kind of help them move to that process which I find funny by the way is when I have guys unsubscribe from me and they say thanks and unsubscribe from me. I've got a girlfriend. And I'm like it just got started buddy. Nile: The victory's done, right? Yeah. Heather: Yeah, well, it just got started. Why don't you stay on the list? Nile: You've got a long way to go there. Heather: You've got a long way to go, right. But I go okay. Nile: Well, you talked about your first business and what you did and how you did it and what you learned about -- hey, I missed the legal stuff and it caused the business to blow up. And in the scheme of things that was a minor thing that you overlooked that became major and relationships are sort of the same way so I could see where that would work and I have to say I've grown through my failures because I've had a lot of failed relationships as well so I'm just happy that I have a very loving and passionate wife today so it works out well. Heather: Good, that's awesome. Congratulations. Nile: We are just about at the end of this particular segment. Heather: Okay. Nile: I want to shift in the next segment and we've got limited time there but I want to talk about mind set and then you talk about some really interesting things. I mean, you compare email to the new TV. You talk about how the TV guide is really so important today and I really want to dig in and get some of that so I'd like everybody to stick around, follow us into the next segment on social media business hour with Heather Havenwood. We'll be right back. Okay, Heather. Heather: Yes. Nile: I'm going to go for about eight minutes and that will leave about four minutes left in this segment and what that will do then is it will give you time to really creatively pitch exactly what you'd like to achieve out of this, what you'd like people to get out of it but what -- where you'd like them to go, products, websites and stuff like that. Heather: Okay, thank you. You're going to let me know when that is so I can -- Nile: Yeah. I just want you to be prepared for it. I'll give you a queue. In fact the queue that I'll give you is Heather, you've got so much great advice and stuff here. How can you help people and so the helping people will be the transition for you to pitch. Heather: Okay. Nile: Okay, we'll be just about ready here. Hey, welcome back to the social media business hour. We're here with Heather Havenwood and as I'd mentioned in the last segment there's a couple of things that I wanted to talk about. One is you've had a number of multimillion dollar businesses now. You've learned a lot about mindset and we haven’t talked much about mind set on this show. We get into the social media elements of it. We're going to get into some of that in just a bit here but in the mindset portion I think it's so critical and I know that you've had to get your mind set right. Tell me a little bit about that process and what you've learned and maybe some of the mentors that you've had along the way. Heather: Well, I've had a lot of mentors along the way. It definitely wasn’t me in my head. That's the worst place to go. Just you and your head is the worst place. You've got to get out of your head. Especially if you're going to do something and I had a lot of different mentors along the way, coaches. And that's why I think -- that's why I'm a great coach now and do business because I've been through it. I'm a business coach. I would say more a marketing business coach now. But I do have a few things I stare at every day. Life lessons. I call them life lessons and they're written down on a piece of paper. I wrote down on that piece of paper. Oh, my god. Almost six years ago. Probably in the middle of my bankruptcy in Florida when I was literally broke. I mean, I was broke. I had -- I lost everything I had. My car, my dog and a cell phone. And I -- my car was paid off luckily so literally my only expense in life was a cell phone and gas in the car and food. And kind of did what I call hopping on people's couches for a little bit and a life lesson that I wrote down and I have now kept literally along the way. I'm staring at it right now. I'm looking at one. Okay, number three. I like this one. I'm the most important person in my life. Mature selfishness. Okay. That's a key one. That might not sound like -- what do you mean? It's like because if you're not taking care of yourself you can't help other people. If you're not taking care of yourself you can't build a business. If you're not taking care of yourself you can't be in a great relationship. It's called mature selfishness. I'm going to go back to Donald Trump just because he's in the news. He's what I call mature selfishness. People think he's narcissistic. He's not. He's just mature selfishness. He takes care of himself and takes care of this business and then takes care of people. His loved ones. Therefore he has a rock to stand on to go out and promote whatever he wants if you notice. So, that's what I call mature selfishness and I had to learn that versus constantly just taking care and building everybody else up. I had to take care of myself. That's a huge mind set because we're not taught that at a young age, we're not taught that in school, we're not taught to care of yourself first. Mature selfishness is more like don't be selfish. Share your toy. So you are constantly sharing. Especially as a female. You're sharing, sharing. Don't be selfish, don't be selfish, don't be selfish, be a good little girl. So, you have to shift that when you're an entrepreneur. You have to take care of yourself. You have to take care of the legal stuff. You've got to make sure that the Ts are crossed dotted Is so that's a big mind shift that I had to really focus on but the more I take care of my business and myself then I can help other people more. You can't help somebody when you're homeless. So, it's harder to do that. So, would say that that's a key lesson I had to take on. The other one was from Joe Sugerman actually and he taught me this. Everything happens for the best. Everything happens for the best. You probably heard everything happens for a reason and he said don't say that because then your mind will look for the reason. Well, what's the reason, why, why, why? You can't do that. It's like everything happens for the best and as long as you feel that no matter what the situation is. Bad, good, car wreck or someone giving you flowers everything happens for the best. It's about the process of where else you're going. It's on the journey. And he's gone through his own failures and so we talked a lot about that and for me that was a big one. It's that shift. Because I always thought everything happens for a reason. So, when the bankruptcy happened it was like there's a reason. I just went into that spiral. Like something's wrong with me. And you can't do that. It's like well, what was the lesson? Lesson was illegal. The lesson was you didn't look at this piece of the business. That's why this happened. It wasn’t that you didn't build something great. You did. In fact, today, that business is still alive doing very well. So, it's not that you didn't build that. You just forgot to look at this piece life lesson. Everything happens for the best. And actually it did happen for the best because if it wasn’t for that business partner taking everything then I probably would still be working for him or working with him. Not for him but with him and I would -- still would be in that business. I'd still be building that for him because it was like his face versus building something strictly just for me. So, I think that did happen for the best and I wouldn’t have been on the island for a year and stared at the ocean. I think that's the big piece is mind set as you have to shift that completely. Nile: I love that and I like how you talked about -- you keep those things in front of you like a vision board if you will. It's a part of where you're going and where you're heading. Well, the other thing that I wanted to get to is you talk about email is the new TV and you talk about how TV guide is so important. I want to work those things in because I know they relate a little bit to the social part _____30:21 part of what we're doing but we're just such -- limited time. We've got to get those in. Heather: Yeah, let’s get that in. so, I'll give you my mind set on email marketing. I would say my expertise is email marketing online perspective and copywriting. I do a lot of copy in email. So, email copywriting I guess and I mean, I'm doing between -- depending on the list, between four to six emails outbound a day. That's broadcasting. Sometimes more, sometimes less, depending on the day. So, I'm constantly doing email copy and email writing and people always say -- in some of the lists I send more than two or three times a day. People go why would you ever do that? Bla, bla, bla. And I always say well, let's analogy with TV. If I turn on the TV right now are they going to be advertising to me? Yes. Are they going to be advertising to me at eight o'clock at night? Yes. Are they going to stop advertising to me at all ever during the day just because they don't want to upset me? No, never. So that's the first key. Never stop advertising to your business meaning going to a click or going to an offer. Whatever that is. Number one. Number two, let’s look at the TV and I'll have you answer it. What's on usually in the morning? Nile: News. Heather: Great. What's on usually around noon? Nile: News. Heather: _____31:46 channel, right. Yeah, usually soap operas, stuff like that, okay, game shows, okay. What's on usually around four? Nile: I'm going to go back to news. Heather: News. Yeah. Throw them back. I watch FOX News all the time so I totally get that. So, around four it's usually like Ellen Show, different shows, talk shows, okay. And then what's on at night? Nile: Total entertainment. Heather: News. Total entertainment or news, right. So, I'm a big Kelly file -- like Megan Kelly I love you. I want to be like you. Okay. I do. I'm totally a Kelly freak and for like -- what's funny is I'll only watch her. I'm like I want to watch her. But I'll catch snippets of Bill O'Riley or catch snippets of _____32:28 right before and after her and they're saying the same story, okay. They're literally covering sometimes the same thing but I like how Megan Kelly says it. Nile: Absolutely. Heather: Right? Nile: If I go back to the tease that you did hey, I could say the same thing but I like the way you said it. Heather: Thank you. But that's email marketing. People -- FOX News is not going to go well Bill you already covered that. Kelly you can't cover that. They're not going to do that. Nile: Right. Heather: Because they know people like -- there's a demographic for Bill, there's a demographic for Hanna, there's a demographic for Kelly and people go tune in. they still want their advertising dollars and those eyes. So that's why they do that. They know that. Why are we not doing that with email marketing? You should. Same thing for social media I think. Social media unfortunately is a little more distraction but it's changing to have that entertainment and the timing value but with email specifically we're taught news in the morning, entertainment -- a little more relaxing in the afternoon, information around four o'clock and then news again. Wrap up of the day, right. We're taught that. Over and over. And 30 years of that on TV. 50 years, 60 years. So, why are we not doing that with our marketing? You should be. Nile: It makes perfect sense. Well, listen, in a minute or less though because I want to have people know how you might be able to help them but I want the TV guide story so can you give us that in like maybe even 30 seconds or less. Heather: Yeah, so TV guide story is _____33:58 the TV guide is -- you should be following the TV guide, old school TV guide in -- Nile: See, I missed that. I'm thinking the printed TV guide. Heather: Yeah, no, the TV guide -- the old. It is old school _____34:10 TV guide. I remember those days. You used to pick it up at the grocery store. But the old TV guide and how they structure it is what you should be doing with your marketing. You should be following up. Nile: Makes sense. It just took longer to communicate with the thickhead so I appreciate you clarifying that for me. Heather: Sure, no problem. Nile: So, hey how can you help people? Heather: So, I can help people in two ways. If you're a guy and you want to learn how to talk to women and communicate and attract a woman in your life you can go to datingtriggers.com. You're welcome to get on my list and communicate that way. But the thing I'm being focused on for 2015 is my coaching and my goal is to take 10 people and their business and focus with them on their marketing and double their business this year. So, I'm a marketing coach. I'm looking for people specifically that want to work with me and taking their business, doubling it. Now, it could be online or offline. Right now I'm working with a weight loss center. I'm working with a guy who's a producer, a guy who's in _____35:11 it doesn’t have to be “online” because there’s always an online perspective of every business. _____35:17 acupuncture. So, that's what I'm looking for and I want to help people do that so you can go to heatherhavenwood.com and then click on work with me and let's get on the phone and talk it out. I'm a one on one person so I want to work with specifically about 10 people this year. Nile: And I bet you want the people that really are the right fit, that you're highly confident that you could really help. Heather: Yes, yes, absolutely. Nile: Makes perfect sense and by the way, then it gets fun for everybody to -- Heather: Yeah, they make a lot more money and they have fun, they learn a new skill set, yeah. And it's not a done for you. I teach you how to fish. Not -- I'm going to -- I'm not a consultant or I do it for you. I'm not a service provider. I want you to learn the skillset of this so you have it forever and that's what I did. I had to learn it so now I have it forever and I get to do it over and over and over again and constantly make money. Joe Sugarman said to me once; he said -- he goes sometimes people ask me if I get nervous _____36:15 or whatever and I said no -- he said to me no. I never have that fear because I know in my heart that I have the power of the pin. I can write an ad to sell anything and there's a confidence there and I feel I'm gaining that confidence that I can really sell anything with the power of the pen. In my case it's the typewriter or a note book or MacBook Pro, right. But it's the power of the words and understanding wordsmith, understanding marketing and getting people to buy something for your business is key and that's what I help people do. Nile: Well, Heather I want to thank you so much for joining us and -- Heather: Oh, you're welcome. Hey Jordan. Nile: Jordan ran off a different direction already but hey, thanks of joining us and for all of you thanks for joining us on the social media business hour as well. Hopefully you learned a few new ideas or concepts. Maybe you were reminded of a few things that you already know but you haven’t been doing to improve or grow your business. In this case your business or your life. My desire is that you take just one of the things that you learned or were reminded of today and you apply it to your business or life this week. I know that a small change can make a big difference and I am committed to bringing you at least one new idea each week that you could implement so go back and listen if you didn't pick up anything. Identify just one small change that you could make to your business or life this week and see what a big difference it will make for you. So, until next week, this is Nile Nickel. Now, go make it happen. [/content_toggle]

Website: www.HeatherHavenwood.com Facebook: www.facebook.com/heatherhavenwood LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/heatherannd Twitter: @hhavenwood