Kink and Relationships on the Autism Spectrum - with Steph Takaya

A Slut’s Guide To Happiness

In mainstream media, autism is often depicted as a deterrent to successful romantic or sexual relationships. Steph presents an alternate perspective: autism is a different way of thinking and being that can be harnessed as interpersonal superpowers. For example, autistic people are often highly empathetic, have a strong moral compass and are more comfortable with direct communication. Autism can also be associated with different sensory and sexual desires. Embracing, rather than trying to “fix” these differences allows for a world of exciting freedom and possibility.

Both academic research and Steph’s personal and community experience suggest that forms of non-traditional sexuality, including kink, polyamory and queerness, are more prevalent among autistic people than the general public. Steph describes how BDSM kink allowed them to reconnect with their sexuality as they discovered the importance of novelty and sensation for the way they think and experience the world.

Comfort with thinking outside social norms and communicating their feelings directly with others now helps Steph sustain successful polyamorous relationships. Their partner joins us off-camera to discuss ways they interact with Steph’s neurodivergent thinking and communication styles.

This episode offers autistic people and their loved ones support and ideas in their journey of self-exploration and authentic sexual and romantic connections.

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