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RecoverU is a podcast where we talk about sex addiction, betrayal trauma, mental, emotional and physical health, faith, and anything and everything needed to RecoverU to your most authentic self that God created you to be.
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Sex, Love, and Addiction

Robert Weiss, PhD, MSW

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On Sex, Love, and Addiction, Dr. Rob Weiss, sex therapist and author of a dozen books on sex and relationship healing, interviews global experts like Dr’s. Sue Johnson, Harville Hendrix, Dr. Stan Tatkin, and Helen Fisher, Dr. Kenneth Adams among others. This podcast features robust discussions focused on healing from chronic infidelity, cheating, porn, and sex addiction, along with the pain of relationship betrayal. Dr. Rob is Chief Clinical Officer for Seeking integrity Treatment Centers. H ...
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Helping you better understand Sex, Porn & Love Addiction; guiding you through the neuroscience of the brain and sharing what we now better understand about the brain's involvement, from childhood development. To help you effect change; find the real authentic you (whose truth self went off at a tangent in childhood); so that as you discover and become re-acquainted with the real you, having learnt to like yourself, you are equipped to be the best that you can be.Maximise the living of an inc ...
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How do men who struggle with a femdom & findom addiction can change and create a healthy, positive and fulfillfing sex life with real intimacy? - I am Tobias and I want to break the silence about destructive sexual behavior in the realm of femdom and findom. I went through an intense femdom & findom addiction in the last 9 years and successfully came out of it. Now I create helpful content and a safe space to open up for all the men that are negatively affected by femdom and findom. Are you ...
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"Welcome to our February Mailbag episode, where we tackle your most pressing questions on addiction, therapy, and relationships! 💬 In this discussion, we cover: 🔹 Does skipping 12-step programs increase relapse risk? 🔹 Should addicts share what they discuss in therapy with their partners? 🔹 Can privacy and transparency coexist in recovery? 🔹 When i…
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Send us a text - On-Demand Programme Link - https://mailchi.mp/bb2a7b851246/kairos-centre Gen A and their siblings, listen up. Hear this bit of neurobiology. At puberty, males Androgen levels explode at puberty and between aged 13 to 15. It is 10 to 30 times higher at puberty, than pre-puberty. In females, Androgen levels (such as Testosterone - an…
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Dr. Rob and Dr. Erika Schwartz continue their discussion about the connection between intimacy and sex. She highlights the role of hormones in sex addiction and betrayal, addresses the myths of monogamy, and counters the dangerous statement that too many betraying partners tell themselves, because what you don’t know actually will hurt you, will hu…
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In today's episode, Kylene answers questions submitted by betrayed partners including - how do you deal with the pain of an affair and what happens if he says he loves you, but isn't "in love" with you? She answers these questions in a very broad perspective but encourages each individual to work with a practitioner 1:1 so that your individual pain…
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When it comes to addiction recovery, how much transparency should there be between partners? Should an addict share what they’re working on in therapy, at their 12 step meetings, or is it a private space for personal growth? While therapy is a personal journey, shutting out a partner completely can create barriers to healing. How can couples naviga…
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Is attending a 12-step program essential for addiction recovery, or can therapy alone be enough? In this episode, we break down the key factors that contribute to long-term sobriety and discuss the role of community, therapy, and personal commitment in preventing relapse. This episode is answering our a mailbag question. Send your questions to conv…
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Technology is evolving rapidly, making our lives easier, saving us time and energy. But as we gain more convenience, are we losing meaningful human connection? While technology offers incredible opportunities—like remote work and online therapy—it also challenges our ability to connect authentically. How do we embrace its benefits without falling i…
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Send us a text - On-Demand Programme Link - https://mailchi.mp/bb2a7b851246/kairos-centre In this episode, the audio takes you through matters which could be contained in a Relapse prevention card which you keep with you at all times. This narrative will focus upon what might be included in a Personal Relapse Prevention Plan (PRPP): Your identified…
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Dr. Rob and Dr. Erika Schwartz discuss the connection between intimacy and sex – what it is, how it varies based on age, gender, and culture, and what a partner’s betrayal really means about the relationship. The author of The Intimacy Solution, Dr. Erika explores the connection between sex and intimacy at all stages of life and answers the questio…
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In this episode, Kylene and Patrick talk about the reality of stress, how it can impact your body after betrayal, and how stress won't go away after recovery! They share some personal experiences as well as three things you can do today to help you deal with every stressors: Stay connected in community, determine next steps, and prioritize self car…
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Is secrecy a core component of porn addiction? In this short but insightful discussion, we explore the complexities of porn addiction, including the role of secrecy, social norms, and personal values. Join us as we break down the psychological and behavioral factors behind excessive pornography use. #PornAddiction #MentalHealth #Psychology #Behavio…
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Send us a text - On-Demand Programme Link - https://mailchi.mp/bb2a7b851246/kairos-centre Don't approach your one year (from last 'Acting out) sobriety, as an end to the work. Don't do 'out of sight out of mind'; 'I never want to see that Recovery Programme material again'. Don't do it like that - at the end. 'I can stop reciting my 'Pillars' now. …
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In today's episode, Casey shares his personal story navigating pornography addiction, how technology played a significant role in his exposure and development of addiction, and throughout hte episode we discuss several things we can do as a society and as parents to support our children in living porn free lives. Resources: Gabb Phones - www.GABB.c…
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Terry Crews shares his journey of overcoming sex addiction, healing his marriage, and reclaiming his life. From his early struggles with pornography to the moment his wife confronted him with the question that changed everything—Terry reveals the truth about addiction, shame, and the power of recovery. This is a conversation about courage, honesty,…
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Send us a text - On-Demand Programme Link - https://mailchi.mp/bb2a7b851246/kairos-centre You need to applaud yourself on a job well done - to have got this far - at least one year from last Acting out. Now work towards achieving contentment. Life is a balancing act. On the one hand, you need to keep old habits at bay. Yet, on the other hand, you n…
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In today's episode we answer questions ranging from how we met to how we navigate conflict, and how we help each other through tough times. We have included the questions with a link below in case you would like to use them in a conversation with your partner! Questions in today's episode: https://tinyurl.com/9kjca7m9 If you are a betrayed partner …
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Terry Crews shares his personal journey of overcoming childhood trauma, addiction, and the struggles that shaped his life. From growing up in a strict religious household to discovering unhealthy coping mechanisms at a young age, Terry opens up about the challenges he faced and how they impacted his relationships and self-worth. Terry’s story is on…
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Send us a text - On-Demand Programme Link - https://mailchi.mp/bb2a7b851246/kairos-centre Relapse Prevention tools are for life. Why? Because the neural Pathway that was opened, created and practised for many years, is dominant, but has the potential to be reactivated in an instant. It is easier to reactivate it and it becoming larger than life, fo…
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Terry Crews opens up about the devastating impact of his sex addiction on his wife, his family, and himself. He shares the moment he realized the depth of her pain, the weight of his secrets, and how self-pity fueled his addiction. This is a raw and unfiltered look at accountability, healing, and the difficult road to redemption. #TerryCrews #SexAd…
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It’s always easier to identify negative patterns in someone else. In today’s episode, Kylene shares four common patterns that can show up in both the addicted partner and the betrayed partner — but in different ways: Qualifying and Comparing Using Absolutes like “Always” and “Never” Looking Outward Instead of Inward Dehumanizing Thoughts or Behavio…
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Terry Crews reflects on the moment he had to face his deepest fears, the consequences of his actions, and the truth about himself. Forced to confront his reality, he opens up about the struggle of maintaining an image, the loneliness of fame, and the hard path to redemption. #TerryCrews #SexAddictionRecovery #Healing #OvercomingAddiction #MentalHea…
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Terry Crews opens up about his struggles with pornography addiction, infidelity, and the impact it had on his marriage. He shares the moment he was confronted regarding his addiction, the weight of the secrecy, and how this revelation became the turning point in his life. A story of redemption, self-discovery, and the battle to break free—this is T…
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Send us a text - On-Demand Programme Link - https://mailchi.mp/bb2a7b851246/kairos-centre When all your Recovery Programme tools, skills and resources are not coming to your aid - have failed you - just R.U.N. There are times when all else fails and R.U.N really is the last option available to you in that moment. Don't debate with yourself; don't r…
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In today's episode, Patrick shares four ways a recovering addict can show up for their betrayed partner while demonstrating consistency, sincerity and healing: Make an effort to understand Focus on your own healing Practice your responses Don't seek her external validation We often mention the "Help Her Heal" workbook and encourage you to utilize t…
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Send us a text - On-Demand Programme Link - https://mailchi.mp/bb2a7b851246/kairos-centre 'Brain, I'm telling you - you don't fight fair. Underhand. Dirty. I'm trying to do this for us. Are you listening to me?' I do a strange thing with everyone of my Sex Addiction clients. Multi-talented as I am, I do brain surgery on each one. (Mine is a bit cru…
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What does it take to have a healthy relationship?? Honesty, safety, trust, and vulnerability—these are the building blocks of true intimacy. It’s a process, a skill, and sometimes, a complete re-education. #TrustBuilding #HealingTogether #Codependency #HealthyRelationships #SelfAwareness #SexAddiction #BetrayalTrauma #TheRabbsmiths #DanDrake…
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Erin Stretar (pronounced Streeter) shares three powerful tools she recommends to all her clients navigating betrayal recovery in this week’s RecoverU episode. Discover how journaling, self-soothing techniques, and building a strong support system can empower your healing journey. Erin provides practical tips and real-life applications you can start…
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Graeme Daniels, lead author of Getting Real About Sex Addiction, a Rowman & Littlefield/Bloomsbury publication, talks psychoanalysis, masculine ego, psychosis and addiction, with Portuguese psychologist Pedro Job, relating these subjects to the film and play, Dr. Strangelove.Von Graeme Daniels
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Are we doing enough to educate professionals on betrayal trauma and sex addiction? Many therapists graduate without proper training in these areas, leaving people struggling to find the right support. If you're seeking help, it’s crucial to find a specialist who truly understands your experience—not just someone who checked a box. #MentalHealthMatt…
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Send us a text - On-Demand Programme Link - https://mailchi.mp/bb2a7b851246/kairos-centre Undistort your Cognitive Distortions. How? What are Cognitive Distortions? Examples might be: 'All guys do it', 'At least I am no longer visiting porn sites', 'I'll only be on here for 5 minutes, no longer', 'What I do, is not as bad as...', 'What an horrendou…
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In this episode, Kylene and Patrick walk through how to use a polygraph (lie detector test) as part of recovery, reconciliation and trust building after betrayal and discovery. Some questions they answer are: Why use a polygraph? How to find a polygrapher What to look for in a polygrapher- interview questions to consider Best practices for creating…
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Mental health awareness has come a long way, but we still need more understanding about trauma, addiction, and healing. Betrayal trauma, in particular, is widely not understood by addicts, therapists and the general public. #MentalHealthMatters #HealingJourney #BetrayalTrauma #BarbaraSteffens #Podcast #Sexaddiction #Addiction…
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Send us a text - On-Demand Programme Link - https://mailchi.mp/bb2a7b851246/kairos-centre Negative Core Beliefs are often hidden from view. Often disguised; but masquerade as truths. They live in the unconscious. Not easily touchable. They work away in the hidden place doing their worst. They are uninvited guests. They have over stayed their invita…
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Congratulations to Patrick on 4 years in recovery! I'm so proud of you.In this episode, Kylene briefly shares what it feels like to be hitting the 4 year mark of recovery together, and why the intense and purposeful effort they made has truly been worth it. If you are a betrayed partner and would like to connect with Kylene for 1:1 coaching support…
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Divorce feels similar to being widowed. You've lost your partner, you've lost the life and the future you thought you had, and you experience a significant amount of grief. Divorce after betrayal can feel isolating and overwhelming. This is why Kim Hansen Petroni has written her workbook: "Not a Casserole Widow" to provide education and cultivate s…
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In this follow-up to his discussion with AB1775 plaintiff Don Mathews, Graeme Daniels, lead author of Getting Real About Sex Addiction, a Rowman & Littlefield publication, speaks of laws that inhibit proper use of mental treatment, the implications for mandated treatment episodes, plus the problem of people being deterred from proper treatment alto…
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In this episode, we talk about the complex dynamics of narcissistic relationships with Dr. Janie Lacy, particularly focusing on how being with a narcissist can create lasting emotional harm. Through relatable insights, we highlight how love bombing, devaluing, and discarding cycles play out in long-term relationships, leaving partners feeling inade…
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In this episode, we break down the dynamics of toxic relationships with Dr. Janie Lacy, helping you identify patterns and behaviors that may dangerous. We explore the emotional roller coaster of push-pull dynamics and unfulfilled needs that keeps people stuck. We also address the underlying feelings of abandonment, anxiety, and loneliness that can …
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Send us a text - On-Demand Programme Link - https://mailchi.mp/bb2a7b851246/kairos-centre Create new thinking to change the behaviour. How? A step at a time, to re-wire the brain. Create new Neural Pathways progressively over time. What is this thing called Neural Pathways? The hamster wheel patterns of behaviours. Those habits. The programming so …
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Life can be stressful on its own, but navigating recovery after addiction and betrayal adds layers of tension, overwhelming emotions, and uncertainty. In today’s episode, Kylene and Patrick explore how the fruits of the Spirit can serve as a powerful self-reflection tool to guide growth and healing in your recovery journey. By focusing on cultivati…
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Today, we tackle the compelling question: Is codependency a part of sex addiction? Through a dynamic conversation, we explore if and how codependency manifests in addiction and recovery. We examine the intersection of addiction, control, and the veneer addicts use to manage how others perceive them, shedding light on the deeper dynamics at play. Wh…
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In this episode, we explore the fine line between genuine care for others and the patterns of codependency. Through an insightful discussion, we examine the difference between healthy caregiving and behaviors that lead to self-depletion, resentment, or feelings of martyrdom. Using real-world examples, we highlight how codependency often stems from …
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Send us a text - On-Demand Programme Link - https://mailchi.mp/bb2a7b851246/kairos-centre A poem by Portia Nelson, published in her book There's a Hole in My Sidewalk: The Romance of Self-Discovery Verse I I walk down the street. There is a deep hole in the sidewalk I fall in. I am lost ... I am helpless. It isn't my fault. It takes forever to find…
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Is there a difference between sobriety and recovery? Is recovery just a longer version of sobriety? In this episode of RecoverU Kylene and Patrick share their perspective on the differences between sobriety and recovery and the type of actions and behaviors it takes to move into a life of recovery, and ultimately freedom, after a life of sex or por…
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In this episode, we talk about the complex world of codependency, exploring its roots, dynamics, and if it is a part of sex addiction. Drawing from expert insights, we unpack the definition of codependency. Through thoughtful discussion, we examine the fear of expressing needs, the denial of self, and the deep-seated desire to manage others’ percep…
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Graeme Daniels, lead author of Getting Real About Sex Addiction, published by Rowman & Littlefield, interviews Don Mathews, plaintiff in the forthcoming case against the state of California and a 2015 law originally named Assembly Bill 1775. This case, a decade in the making, is about privacy rights and psychotherapy versus the state's efforts to p…
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In this special mailbag episode of Conversations on Sex, Addiction, and Relationships, we tackle a powerful question from a viewer about the addict wanting to be heard and seen in the relationship. Through engaging analogies and thoughtful insights, our experts explore the critical importance of timing in addressing trauma, the challenges addicts f…
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